The opposite sex is sure to swoon in your presence when you are wearing a shirt that says “Hello I am sensitive and kind like a little baby bunny rabbit” but also says “I have a seriously big gun so watch out okay!”

However that is not the only reason you should purchase a Moofwear shirt, oh no! Moofwear clothing serves a higher purpose than helping you in your endless crazy search for human companionship and love in this tipsy-topsy world; it feels really really good against your skin, like the soft caress of a dairy cow rubbing against your body.

Moofwear clothing will keep you warm in the long winter months my friends. When you are foraging for berries and nuts in the woods you will say to yourself “Thank goodness for this beautiful shirt with a dinosaur on it, without it myself and my family would be sure to starve this year, the snow is coming heavier and thicker than ever before – this is sure to be the storm of the century!”

In the summer months why not take your Moofwear shirt to the beach? You can take it off when you swim in the warm ocean, but you don’t have to because Moofwear shirts are 100% guaranteed to scare away nine out of ten sharks! If you live in Arizona or Utah then I am sorry but you do not have any beaches nearby; but do not worry – sharks also live in aquariums!

In the fall your Moofwear shirt will protect your body from dangerous falling leaves, pinecones, and maybe even coconuts!

In the spring, why not frolic in a lush green meadow! Wearing Moofwear!

Moofwear could truly be the best purchase you will ever make in your entire life, and you will appreciate it all year round!

Here are the Moofwear shirt styles currently in stock: dinosaur, bunny, and bee!